Discipline (will I ever learn)

God has a plan in my life.

I am learning I need to be disciplined in my study, in my prayer, in my faith, in my relationships, in my learning, in everything... to start to work towards what God has planned for me.

For far too long I have shown apathy. When will I grow up? When will I learn?

Today

I cried

I haven't cried for a long time, I don't really remember when but I think it might be after losing a table-tennis match as a teenager or breaking up with a childhood sweetheart (I am a little embarrassed by this...), where has my soul gone?!!

Well this weekend, I was blessed to spend time with David Campbell (the founder of our church) and other fantastic guys. On Saturday night David prophesied into my life and 3 other great mates' lives (Dave, Daley, Stew) about how we would go into full time ministry in the future (something I had been thinking about for aaagggeesss...).

It was a lovely time where we prayed over each other and then spoke words from God into each others lives. I went last.

For the first time in too long I cried. I wept. I sobbed.

It was amazing.

The lord answering the prayers of my heart with words from my friends. The Lord giving me hope, excitement and challenge through my friends. The Lord humbling me through his plan.

I was at first overcome with a desire to be looked after, comforted (Isaiah 66:13), a friend immediately brought a word about how the Lord recognised my need and hunger.

The guys brought pictures about Band of Brothers (Hebrews 12:1 - "Weapons and ammo only"), a fruit tree (the only provision I need coming from God, and God alone), dropped tools and some others I won't share.

I was overcome with a feeling of unworthiness. Why me? Who even am I? Why do I deserve this plan? These blessings? These friends? How can I even serve God? What can I even bring?

This is what God was comforting me with.

I cried.

I hugged my friends.

I cried.

I laughed.

Thank you Lord.

Significance

I have just returned from an exciting weekend with other Students from Emmanuel. A weekend of excellent teaching, joyful fellowship and a God speaking to some little students.

We were blessed.

David Campbell (founder of Emmanuel 30 years ago, now in Canada) spoke at each session. Again, he blew us away.

One of the messages that got my attention was about Church... I love church.

All that church needs to be and how it needs to be it. Check out my summary of the church here, summary is a bit lacking but it makes some points...

The big point was about how Jesus brought significance and value to people (Woman at the well, Zacheus, disciples, me), people have worth, a purpose - because of Jesus.

How did he do this? Talking to them, bringing words from God, devoting time to them, teaching them loving them. This is an example for us, when we hear from God (which may be more than we think) we need to be faithful, brave and confident in sharing God's word. A specific word from God for me makes me step back, a word that speaks directly to my life, encouraging or admonishing, amazes me and challenges me. But also gives me value, significance and love. God cares, so much so he is willing to speak directly into my life.

This is what Jesus did so well, what David did with us students by caring, being interested and by speaking powerful words directly to many of us.

Value is found in God, in Church, in Love, not anywhere else.

Horrific

I follow John Piper on twitter, he just posted a link about persecution in India.

I watched the first video, and was sickened at the short clips of brothers being beaten for their faith.

It is pretty emotional.

I couldn't watch the second one.

How can this happen in the real world?!

Why am I bothered about little things in my life, when Christians today are being treated like that for believing what I do...?!!

We are so blessed to live in this country, safe.

There is so much to do.

Song that reminds me of Dad, and childhood.

Martyn Joseph - He never said

It is beautiful

Addiction

I just sat next to a guy in the library who spent about 45minutes on betting websites, putting bets on who would win the first set of a tennis match, what the score would be at half-time of a football match or who would win the world match play golf. I have seen him before, always on betting websites.

It made me pretty sad.

But also reminded me of addictions that I have had and do have.
There is freedom from addiction in Christ. That is part of his hope on the cross. We no longer need to live lives of the flesh, but lives of the spirit, in tune to his work and his ways.
I hope that one day I can tell others that when they are sat next to me in the library and it will change their lives.
Being a Christian isn't simple about growth, and works, it is about complete transformation.

YES PLEASE

Brothers in Christ

I am convinced that members of the Roman Catholic church are my brothers in Christ.

The pope is visiting the Uk in 2010, I find this quite exciting, and maybe a little worrying (not sure I agree with some of Catholic ideas on certain topics... (Could I get more vague)).

But in an article about the visit I read this ...
"Deacon Jack Sullivan, who is to visit Britain in November, said he became completely free of pain after praying to Cardinal Newman in 2001. "

This is odd. The person that heals is not Cardinal Newman, the pope, or any other 'saint'. The person that heals is our risen saviour, our Lord and his Spirit performing miracles in and through us.

Not sure someone who lived, then died, and went to heaven, can hear our prayers and answer them (I don't think there is any biblical precident for this), and I don't think they would have the time to, or would be that bothered...!

I am interested to see what the Pope's visit will spark up in terms of debate... (I already have seen a friend who is going to march against his visit in protest against his views on homosexuality, I don't know what his views are, but I think I can guess...)

He is a top man, so I look forward to hearing what he has to say...